I have so many thoughts, and none of them follow a cohesive structure. I'm just gonna ramble, ok?...
My husband started a new job this week, and I am relieved because the great savings account I had in August is now empty. He has been worried that he has felt like a mooch, and I've done my best to qualm those worries, while trying to not complain that I've been working all day and I'm tired.
But yay, we will both be exhausted when we get home!
Being married is stressful, but not stressful at all. Like both being managers of a shop together, and trying to run it smoothly, but being able to say "Let's shut down early." and just veg out. Ideally: his needs, the house needs, and then my needs. Reality: a bit of his needs, mostly my needs, his need, maybe something for the house, more of my needs.
Or like today! Slept in, relaxed, fell back to sleep until early afternoon, made myself lunch (he'd eaten breakfast and lunch by then), watched a movie, loaded the dishwasher, watched another movie, he made me dinner, and now I'm watching another movie. And he has been playing video games all day.
But hey, it's a holiday, hahaha. We'll get back to routine within the week.
Derrick is very kind and patient. A sassy jerk, but with a wink.
Me: "Huh, I should probably wait to fill my glass until I sit down, rather than cross the room with a full glass."
Him: "I have shamed you well."
I am almost 58 years old, so if I am going to have kids, I had better be within the next couple of years. My biological clock ticks differently than Derrick's, haha. I feel such a strong need to start a family as soon as possible, he feels such a strong desire to be financially stable with good benefits before we have a family.
He is not wrong, obviously. He's got a good head on those shoulders. But there is so much unknown and not guaranteed! I worry that we'll wait and wait and then find that we can't have kids or something.
But I am great at over-thinking and worrying.
And he wants to name our kids Thor and Orion, so maybe it's best to wait.