Monday, May 13, 2013

Rational Poultry

Asher: "TVPO is my favorite on Star Wars."
Ryan: "Real men don't use wild cards."
Deborah: "If you go down I will retroactively use my skip!"
Susannah: "I'll retroactive your face!"
"Someone needs to get off the teat, the Mtn Dew teat isn't good at night."
"Please let's not discuss any teats right now."
"Chickens don't have teats! ...could you imagine? With those little beaks? No, they feed them corn like any rational poultry would!"
Mom: "You have a background of Spanish and German."
Sus: "I don't know Spanish."
Mom: "Haven't you heard us speak it?"
Sus: "I block you out because it annoys me."
Dad: "You say 'hola'"
Sus: "No, I say HO-la, and I'm quoting a movie."
Jamie: "I wish I glowed like that but I'm not as righteous as they are."
Melissa: "I wanna wear pasties to the pool."
Ryan: "Where are your pants?"
Sus: "This is a dress!"
Sus: "No wonder I'm chunky; my bladder has to be huge--like at least 80 ounces."
Ryan: "Could you please stop talking about your bladder?"
Sus: "It says here that human bladder capacity is like one liter. I'm on my third liter! IT IS LIKE A SUPER POWER!"
Ryan: "You're a dork."
Sus: "Seriously. I'm like Amazing Roadtrop Partner. That and my amazing singing voice. I feel like I deserve a 'You go girl!' or some other 90's cliché."
Ryan: "You go girl."
Sus: ”Thank you. Thank you!"
Celeste: "During the day they just give you one little packet, at night the give you a handful--they think you're high and just want the hot sauce."
Ryan: "I consider Idaho up there with the Dakotas; I mean...why?"
Sus: "Have you ever been to the Dakotas?"
Ryan: "No."
Ryan: "I'm straight outta Nephi right now."
Ryan: "I decided I'm gonna buy an ambulance...hear me out."
"I brought my date with me!"
"What is your date?"
"I don't know you."
"You can't give me too much crap, your text alert is a light saber."
"There is a big difference between a text alert and a figurine...where did you get that anyway?"
"I bought him in the boy aisle. I love him, but we are on a date so I will awkwardly ignore him all night."

1 comment:

Meridith said...

Oooooohhh the chicken comment. That was fantastic.