Friday, May 25, 2012

A very fluid concept

At midnight I snuggled in to my bed and pulled out my iPad, Jareth the Goblin King. I fell asleep watching My Boys (which came out in like 2006, but I never saw it. It was suggested to me on my instant queue, and I think it is hilarious.) on Netflix, and had really really strange dreams. I was very sure I would remember the details of said dreams, but they disappeared by the time I snoozed my alarms. Boo.

I set 5 alarms on my phone every night because I have the bad habit of turning off the alarm, fully convincing myself I am awake, only to immediately fall back to sleep and not have anything to wake me back up. Oops. This morning I snoozed every single one of the alarms at least once. First alarm went off at 6:45, last one went off at 8:05. I got out of bed around 8:15. :D (I have to leave the house by 8:25 to be at work, clocked in, by 8:45.)

I was draaaaaagggggggging myself around the salon all morning. After a few hours of this, Annicka got herself a Dr Pepper and I decided to venture out for some caffeine as well. I hit the gas station down the street and filled my purple mug (I think its a 44 oz) and purchased a 44 oz cup of Diet Mtn Dew with a splash of Sobe Lean, mmmmm. (I usually go for the cranberry grapefruit, but this station only had that cherry lime one; it was ok.)

The salon was quiet for most of the morning, but it picked up around 12:30. Jamie came in four hours early to get the schedule ready to send to our general manager. Jamie clocked in and helped out with one or two cuts when we got slammed, which was super helpful.

A woman came in with a picture of this:

Her hair was about shoulder-length on the one side and much, much longer on the other. She asked me to cut the short side to her jaw, like in the picture. But she asked me to not touch the length on the other side. Ok.
After finishing everything (she wanted it super choppy, so I had some fun with my razor) I asked her how it looked. She asked if I would make the long side shorter than it was. Yes, yes I would. I told her that I could take about three inches off, it would help the angle. She agreed to it, and thank heavens she did--it looked so much better after that.

Later a woman came in and as I led her to my chair she loudly informed me I was to wash her hair very first, she didn't want to even sit in my chair at all. After I washed her mid-back length hair, she told me she wanted a short pixie cut. Why did I spend the time to condition your ends when they will be landing on the floor in a few seconds? Ok, fine, whatever.
She kept saying, "I want it short, ok? I mean it. Short." I would ask how short she wanted it and she would reply with "Short." OOOOOOOOK. :/ So, when you said short you meant short? Ok, now I understand. Sheesh.
I grabbed a book of hairstyles and started to find a page of pixies so I could get an actual idea of what short meant to her. She ignored me and pulled out her phone. She showed me a picture of Halle Berry and said, "See? Short. Like this short."
I explained that "short" is a very fluid concept around here. I told her that "short" to some people means 1/8" on the side. She said, "Like buzzed short? Ew, not that short."

With this picture in mind, I started cutting on the sides. As I made my way around the back I kept it long, just so I could have her feel it and give me a more definite idea of how short she wanted the back. She felt it and liked it. (Thank goodness I didn't take it shorter first.)

After 40 minutes and a few actual instructions from her, she looked like Kris Jenner. These haircuts are not the same. Nope, not the same.

But the woman loved it and told me it was perfect, just what she'd wanted. Phew! She tipped me well.


So, uh, between April and August of last year I lost something like 38 lbs. Then I went on a cruise for two weeks. Then I traveled through Italy for a week. CRUISE + ITALY = TOOOOOONS OF CARBOLICIOUS FOODS.
So,  uh, I am up 5 lbs, uh 12 lbs, ok 19 lbs! Whatever.

This number doesn't actually faze me all that much. I go up, I go down. I have a jawline, I have no jawline. I can look like completely different people rather quickly. I'm kind of ok with it, is that bad?
Of course I would love to be the thinner, jaw-ed version of me. But I am not going to beat myself up over it. It pains me to see women get so wrapped up in their lack of self-esteem. Love yourself, baby. Have confidence in your awesomeness! Life is too short to freak out.

So anyway, I am back to trying to be very ...umm... controlled? in my lifestyle. I can't unfold my treadmill (seriously. Like, at all. I think it is mocking me.) so that is out, but I have been playing with my Wii Sports and my Wii Fit more.
I am very controlled in my foods now. I bought a new purse-looking lunch bag a few days ago, to encourage me to pack things. I am not supposed to be spending money because I have to pay $1000 for my insurance deductible for getting my new car fixed (oops) and I have about $400 in bills in the next few days, but I decided that if it is encouraging enough that I actually do it the $20 was well spent.

My foods yesterday consisted of: cottage cheese with blackberries, strawberries, applesauce, cauliflower, brussels sprouts, greek yogurt with low-fat granola, low-fat string cheese and a wrap with spinach, turkey, fat-free cheese, mustard and a pickle. After work Meridith asked if I wanted to go with her to get some groceries and ice cream. We got the groceries first, then found that the ice cream place had closed while we were shopping, so we went back in the store and bought some little ice cream packages. I got the teeny tiny 280 calorie Blue Bunny Personals cookie dough ice cream with the oh-so-cute teeny tiny plastic spoon inside.
(So cute. Oh my. I like the packaging because when it's cleaned and dried it makes a great jewelry container for traveling. It is about the size of my palm. I used an old one to take all of my jewelry on my cruise/Italian trip. Fabulous.)

I ended yesterday at about 1,300 calories. Today I had granola and yogurt, an orange, applesauce, baby spinach salad with fat-free dressing, string cheese, cauliflower, brussels sprouts, cottage cheese with strawberries, an apple and a 180 calorie package of parmesan broccoli pasta.
I am ending today around 1,125 calories. Too low for me, I know, I know. But I am not hungry, dang it!

I don't crave, uh, my meals don't really have much meat in them. But I'm taking a vitamin, so, uh, that's good, right?

This is me being good. This is me not giving in to the temptation to just stop eating altogether like I did from January - April 2005.

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