Saturday, February 27, 2010

"Do I smell the revolting stench of self-esteem?"

Oh heavens! I'm having the roughest time writing out my November stories! And I don't feel like I can properly move on until I've written them up because they lay the foundation for December through today!


So because I can't move on with any stories I'm taking this moment to throw out the the little bits that have been on my mind:

* I don't like blueberries. I'm not sure why; a berry is a berry is a berry, right? Whats not to like about a little fruit? And yet I have it set in my mind that I just do not like blueberries.

* The other day a client asked if I enjoyed working so close to BYU. "Yeah, sure, I guess. Its a good location." "I bet you get a bunch of cute college student guys in here, huh?" she winked at me. Eww. A) do not wink at me. B) short skinny tennis team members do not strike my fancy. At all. Tall chubby awkward movie-quoting geeks on the other hand...

"None have caught my eye but I guess we do get a lot of students in, yeah." "Oh, are you dating someone?
Um, why do we need these conversations? I don't know you, I'm here to trim you hair, you pay me, then you leave. Done. Not best friends. Not even Hi friends.
", I'm not." "Well thats ok, too." Thanks for the stamp of approval, Oh Dandruffed One. "Yeah, it is." "I mean, its good to have some You Time and be single for a little while between relationship."
Ha! The "me time" I have is the hot shower between the relationship with my computer and the relationship with my bed at night.
She went on with some condescending babble about of course those who've been single all their lives just aren't putting themselves out there blah blah blah.
She annoyed me a lot.

* My mother says I'm dismissive and I ignore people. My father says I say cruel things that hurt people's feelings. Want to have your cake and eat it, too? I say you can't have it both ways, folks!
(Sus: "Saying I can walk faster than you're driving isn't cruel." Dad: "Yes it is because no you can't." hahahahaha)

* Several people remind me of my big brother, Aaron. I'll be watching TV and go, "Huh, he kinda reminds me of Aaron." Usually their mannerisms.

Sinbad + Mike O'Malley = Aaron

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