Tracy "Hey, will you watch the floor while I smoke?" [keep an eye on the salon]
Jamie: "Yeah, I'll be right there."
Rachel: "Can I go with her?"
Jamie: "You just got back!"
Rachel: "...is that a yes or a no?"
Rachel: "I was babysitting my sisters kids, so I was going through her drawers. She cut her old jeans into a thong...a denim thong!"
Jamie: "I don't know...I'll think about it."
Rachel: "Come on, be a BA."
Everyone: "What's a BA?"
Rachel: "Bad A."
Jamie: "I need you to do something today."
Rachel: "I don't want to do anything today. I have Senioritis."
Jamie: "YOU CAN'T HAVE SENIORITIS FOR A YEAR!"
Jamie: "He was a freak. He was like, 'we could be brother and sister' and I was like OH NO WE COULDN'T."
Sharon: "You went from Brown to Smith? That's horrible!"
Jamie: "Yeah, the first guy with a common name I married."
Jamie: "No black girl is coming to you. She's gonna take one look at whitey and go 'Nuh uh.'"
Tana: "I had a black client once."
Jamie: "Ha, once. Has she ever come back?"
Tana: "Every week ...not to me, though."
Jamie: "I would never say medulla."
Lindsey: "I want to look like a hooker at my wedding. With huge hair and tons of makeup. And my bridesmaids will look like strippers in their little dresses."
Susannah: "Hahaha, and other things I could say if I wanted to give my mother a heart attack."
Rachel: "I pierced my own tongue webbing--the webbing thing under your tongue. I just had a barbell in there. But my mom hated it, she said if I took it out she'd take me to get my nipples pierced. So I did. I was 15."
Susannah: "I have never seen anyone pull out floss from their purse and use it in the middle of a conversation. I mean...no offense...merely observational.
Sharon: "Until you are behind that counter with that green apron on, you have no idea." [on working at Starbucks]
Gina: "Some people just have naturally good hygiene."
Sharon: "That **** got on my wrong side and I ran and squealed like a little pig."
Gina: "It's cold in here!"
Jamie: "You can [points to thermostat] tell it to stop that."
Jamie: "What will happen if you put perm solution on hair containing metallic salts?"
Susannah: "It will break, it will MELT!"
Everyone: "It will break off."
Tana: "It will EXPLODE."
Jamie: "Explode? That'd be cool."
Tana: "Bust out the marshmallows."