Friday, March 14, 2008

"I am a beautiful man." - Howie Mandel

It is a day where not one specific thing creates the mood of the day, rather a series of events.
I didn't get nearly enough sleep last night, and I haven't eaten anything, and I've had more Diet Coke today than any human should consume in a week (1.5 gallons -- 3 entire 64 ounce cups.) So I'm a bit moody.

And it is something I can't quite explain. Nadia asked what was wrong, and I told her I was having a bad week. She replied, "No, my week was bad." ...ok. I can't combat that.

All day long I put up a front. I'm never myself. And that kind of drives me batty. I would let my actual personality show if I weren't sick of hearing "You're so weird, Susannah." Today a girl named Sharon said, "You're just so shy and quiet, Susannah, that they just don't click with you." And later, when I had a client thrust upon me much to my chagrin, someone said, "Aw, and she accepted it with a smile and laugh!" Oh holy crap, you people don't know me AT ALL.

If I were actually around someone who understood me in the slightest it would make such a difference. Shy and quiet? In some situations, yeah, but Wow, certainly not what I'm known for. And accepting something I don't want to do with a smile and laugh? hello, I laugh all the time, at EVERYTHING. My little sister even WROTE A PAPER on how my laugh means more than just a laugh. And I am definitely not one to accept things I don't like without grumbling, procrastinating, and rebelling. That was a "You are insane if you think I'm going to do this client" laugh.

I'm a bit sick of the fashion, celebrity, hair, makeup, etc world. And I'm a bit sick of having to pretend I care. And I'm quite a bit sick of hearing "You're so weird" because I'd choose Weird Al Yankovic over Ludacris/50 Cent/Kanye West/whomever anyday.

...where's my Diet Coke?


Meridith said...

Oh, yeah, I forgot I had written that paper. Yes, I'm awesome!!

Love you, Sue.

Sarah C. said...

It's just because you're awesome Sue. They don't get it, losers. Kanye is for squares anyway.