I am so entirely sick of my voice. Just decide already!!! It wavers in and out like a 12-year-old boy. Be thoroughly sick or be normal already, dang it.
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I'm out of cute outfits. My recent stuff is now too big on me, and my old stuff that fits is ugly. ...Or I've ripped it in some way (hello my white linen skirt! Hello my brown & red plaid wide-cuff trousers!) ...Or, frankly, it is dirty and I am too dang lazy to do a load of washing.
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I don't handle compliments well. For a bunch of different reasons. Sometimes I feel like I just don't deserve the compliment--ok, most of the time. I used to verbally negate the compliment, but got chided for that by The Honeyman last summer. I will usually laugh now, but unconsciously.
"I love how you just laugh everytime I compliment you." -AJ
Other times I feel almost that I have a new standard every time I recieve a compliment. Like if someone says, "You always wear the cutest shoes!" I now feel required to wear cute shoes when I know I will be around that person. It's stressful, actually. I end up spending hours on each outfit going over every detail meticulously. It has to A) fit, B) look OK- which goes along with A, C) be fashion-forward or at least not totally faux pas, D) have the correct shoes, E) have cute complimentary earrings.
Every freaking thing I put on gets thought about over and over. How annoying is that??? For example, Thursday night I hadn't received any compliments by the group I was going to be around that night so I was OK with wearing my Chubby Girl Brigade shirt, jeans, white flip-flops, and my jagged line earrings. Ok, fine and dandy, whatever. But then! Someone liked my shirt! Someone liked my earrings! No!!!
Friday I wore: black wide-cuff trousers, light pink tank top, dark pink tank top, black fitted track jacket, pink chandelier earrings, and baby pink ankle-wrap wedges. Oh no! A bunch of people complimented the outfit! Someone liked the earrings!
Tonight I wore: black cap-sleeve tank top, black mock-wrap top, light blue flared leg jeans, light pink dangly earrings, black pointy-toe high-heeled pumps. Oh no. Someone liked the earrings. Most people loved the shoes. I got called, "So fashion-aware."
How in the world am I supposed to live up to all that??? Now I feel like I can't show up in my gray plaid stretchy pants (that Honeyman abhors anyway), my "I {heart} Nerds" Millhouse Tshirt, hoop earrings, and my bright pink slippers. Not that I'd really want to be outside of the house in that anyway, but it has, unfortunately, been known to happen.
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Not that I don't like the compliments, oh heavens no. I love 'em. Tell me I have "only great shoes" all you want! It's not true, of course, but it doesn't make it any less fun to hear.
And everyone needs to be told they are a "cutie-patootie" once in their life, hahahaha!
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