Violence and name-calling, my work here is done

I'm very stubborn, there is absolutely no denying that. It's a strength as well as a weakness.
I debated in Student Congress on my high school debate team all three years. I'm pretty sure I attended more tournaments than anyone else on the team. It all intrigued me: the people, the subjects, the logic, the amazing speaking skills. My very first tournament I spoke four times. Granted, novice rounds aren't that mind-bending, in fact they are pretty lame-ola. But I was proud of myself for standing up there in front of 20+ of my peers and give my actual opinion on the issue at hand. My speeches sucked and didn't last more than 2 minutes each, but dang gina they rocked.
I don't give my opinion on subjects often; I'm a pretty closed book in that regard. Sure, I'll proclaim any time anywhere my adoration for G-Dub (President Bush) and my Republicanness, but I don't ever really get more specific. Sometimes storing all of those opinions inside can get annoying. I end up wanting to scream things like, "Yeah, chain yourself to a tree--that'll bring world peace!"

After my first tournament I mellowed out because of the fear and embarassment the S.A.D. brought. I occasionally spoke but for the most part I sat back and observed. I always brought a pink legal pad with me to take notes for speeches on, but it usually ended up covered in random comments to myself. I wrote down good points, I mapped out what would've become awesome speeches, I mocked the speaker mercilessly, I wrote Brad Pitt's name repeatedly, I expressed my refusal to vote for Senator JN152 for chairperson because she was a Gore supporter, I wrote my ToDo list, I sketched clothing designs.

As I listened to each speaker give their pro or con speech for the proponent I would get more and more angry. Were these people just ALL STUPID? Did they not realize how unlogical their ideas were??? I could see our countries doom in 25 years with every word from each speaker; was this generation actually expected to run the country???
My ideas were better, my ideas were perfect! (My ideas went unsaid.) And it was then that I realize I can not truly debate. I can't. I get too fed up with the other persons lack of logic and I revert to violence and name-calling. Many many times did I write something like, "The idiot is so dumb--I just want to kick her!" on my notes.


Because of my experience of taking debate the lack of logic in peoples arguments is my biggest pet peeve. (My mother does this ALL. THE. TIME. It frustrates me to no end.) My dad says I am like a guy in that aspect: I think logically rather than emotionally.

So now I try to avoid debates if at all possible. Often the forums I frequent will have someone ranting about something and if I read the posts I will get worked up and just plain annoyed that someone is so dumb that they would actually think that way. But when I do get in the debates I fight it to the death. I have to prove, in any way possible, that I am correct. (If I'm not correct, and the other person can actually prove me wrong I will usually see the error in my ways and concede.)

What can I say? I'm very stubborn, I can't deny that.