"There are some who call me... Tim?"

I was so incredibly stressed out yesterday. Well, more like one giant anxiety attack. I made Janelle (new roomie) answer the phone and take a message if it was for me. I didn't want to be bugged about tonight. Tonight was supposed to be a large benefit concert that I was hosting for the Debate Team I was coaching this past year. The bands I *tried* to line up all dropped and so I had NO idea what I was going to do. Kummer calling me was the last thing I needed.

So I was sitting here at my desk this morning, still freaking out about what I'm going to do. I decided I'd check my PMs on the schools message board to see again what one of the bands had replied. Well, there was a thread about local bands, so I clicked it. OK... Suddenly *MY* concert has been changed to the 22nd, and a different venue. What the crap?! I'm not THAT hard to get a hold of. Just because I don't TAKE your calls doesn't mean someone can't leave a message that says, "Hey, Susannah, we are changing EVERYTHING, so don't fret this weekend." I wonder if I'm even in charge of it anymore. Should I just not worry about it? Should I assume they have a PA system, sound guy, and bands?! (The things I was to take care of.)

On top of that, Ryan let me know last night that we won't be able to go to Las Vegas next weekend, like we had planned. (Because he is getting a car, blah blah blah, the loan will only cover most, he has to use all his savings for the other part, blah blah blah.) So there goes my vacation. I'm getting so sick of being car-less in Provo.

I was social last night. Shocked, aren't you? Two guys from my ward were hanging out in my apartment when I got home from being with Ryan. I found my first reaction to guys is to be sarcastic and mean. (I think that was a defense mechanism instilled in me during the crappy years in school {2nd grade through senior year}.) But I fought it and was nice, gentle, and down right cutesy feminine. What?! Yep. I even offered and made them snow cones. Aren't I cool?

I was bored after they left so I tried to find a movie to watch. I had seen all my fun ones over and over recently so I didn't want to pick one of those. I was left with chickflicks, and i really didn't want to watch one of those. Nothing like that actually happens in real life; it gives false hopes, hahaha. You are left in a Nora Ephron-induced stupor that causes you to do dumb things, like reveal crushes on your best friend(!!?!) and other moronic things.

I need a vacation from myself.