"And so, you know, whatever."

--TRANSCRIPTION--

So it turns out that MyBoyfriendMike is married. ...at least we think so. Hahaha; we've gone through this whole "is married", "isn't married", "is married", "isn't married" thing. We just don't know anymore. But I'm pretty sure he is. ...Because back when we thought he was single and Jayar thought he was married it was because he met some skinny brunette who introduced herself as "Mike's wife"...you know, pretty big hint. Hahaha. But we weren't sure still because Julie had heard that he was single because she was doing the refinance for his wife, after the wife left Mike and blah blah blah. So I told Julie about this brunette and she was like, "I don't know who that is" she's like "that's not the wife that just left him" so, um, and he doesn't wear a ring and so we don't know.

So the other day...it was like, it was late, it was like 7-something, I was playing on highspeed because I don't have highspeed at home and I was jealous; so I was playing on highspeed at work and ...umm...this chick comes in and uh was taking out the trash (gosh I mumble!) And it's a different chick than usual. Usually it's Patricia, I think her name is. Yeah, because she goes by Trish. Usually it's Patricia and this wasn't Patricia. (What can I say? I'm observant. haha) So I was like "who are you?" So this chick like empties the garbage then she's emptyin' 'em into the big garbage in the hall. ...And MyBoyfriendMike walks by. And he says "hey" to her and kisses her outside my door. And I was like, "Hello, MyBoyfriendMike, don't you realize that I'm right here?" Hahaha, as if he has any clue that I call him MyBoyfriendMike.
And so, um, and then later he called her "Hon" and he called her "Ann" and I was like, "Who the heck? So I guess her..." I was like, "Her name is Ann, ok whatever" and then later he called her Angela. So I was like OK. I had some other names for her...hahaha, they weren't very nice. Hahaha. So I won't say them.

So I didn't know her and umm she wasn't very cute either. She looked like Katie Holmes-post Tom Cruise. Kind of disheveled-and-beaten-daily looking. Hehehe. And so, you know, whatever. She couldn't be MyBoyfriend's wife...'cause that's...no, no. So the other day...and then he went out of town. He's been out of town since like Wednesday--I should know. Hahaha. And so she comes in a few days later and she's emptying the garbages and I was totally a little brazen and I'm like, "Hey, what's your name?" hahaha, and she's like, "Hey, I'm Angie." I'm like, "Hey, I'm Susannah." And we got talking for a bit (MUMBLER!) and I was trying to get her to say "I'm Mike's wife" 'cause I wanted to know; I wanted her to say it. And she was saying that Trish wasn't going to be doing the garbages and stuff because she decided to do it only on the weekends rather than during the weekdays. She was like, "So I'll be doing it for ya" and I was trying to get her still to say "I'm Mike's wife" so I, hahaha, I was being so cheesy, and I asked her how she "scored such a sweet deal?" And yet she just like chuckled and then went on with what she was doing. I'm like "NO, You're supposed to say 'I'm Mike's Wife!'" But it didn't work. So she didn't say anything. So she knows me now and I know her as "Angie"
So oh well. ...Mike's still not back in town. Still...we're waiting daily. Hahaha.

He was in my dream the other night and I went to tell Irma but Connie--Connie the Annoying--was in the office. And I was like, "Irma, oh my gosh, guess who was in my dream!" And the she looked at me and then Connie looked at me and then I'm like Oh dang it, I didn't mean to say it in front of Connie. So then Connie looked back to what she was doing and I just kinda like nodded toward Mike's office, towards the hall. And she's like "Oh" and Connie was like "Who?! Who was it?!" I was like oohhh, I was like "Oh, uh, Mike." She was like, "Mike WHO?" I was like, "Mike, the Building Manager." She was like, "Oh, do you think he's cute?" Hahaha. I said, "I think he's short and has a mullet." Hahahahahaha, totally true. And she was like doing her little cackle and was like, "A mullet! Ha!" ...Ok, Connie, you aren't invited in this conversation. It was pretty funny; and then she's like, "But do you think he's cute?" And I was like, I said "He can open any door in the building; I find that kind of power attractive." She doesn't find me funny; I think I'm hilarious just to myself. But ...she was laughing, she was like, "I guess that is, huh? Ha!" Ok, weirdo. Today, hahaha, today Irma and I were discussing how Mike is still out of town and Irma decided I need a new...a new Work Boyfriend. And I told her I have one; MyTallBoyfriend...he's like 6'5" or 6'4"...but he's not at the office often enough and I know nothing about him, I don't even know his name. I said until then I'm just gonna have to deal with Mike, even if he is married.

(GOT CUT OFF)
I said, "I mean, without my WorkBoyfriend what's the reason to come to work?!" With excellent comedic timing she replied, "The Paycheck" as we pulled in a parking spot.