'Are you aware when you just stare for hours into the sky?/what do you see? can you show it to me, the beauty' -Duncan Sheik

I am in such an odd place. (And I don't mean Las Vegas, though that's a given.) I'm in an odd place mentally and emotionally.

I want my friends here. Even if I don't see them often, just to have them nearby. Just so I have the option of being with them. The other day The Roomie said, "You have a lot of friends, don't you?" I answered in the affirmative. She said, "Where did you get them all?" (She is so WEIRD! by the way.) How do you answer a question like that? Well Wal-Mart was having a sale on Good Friends so I thought I'd get them while the getting was good. ??
Even though I don't really have time to hang out with friends I just want them nearby. I want Meridith nearby. It is a really weird feeling to only know a handful of people in an entire city. I want the option of saying, "Hey Sarah, come over for a few hours--I rented some cool movies." Instead of saying, "Hey Sarah, are the plans still on for you to stop by on your way to California next month?"


I don't know why I am so against meeting new people. The two or three people I am friends with here have been great. I dunno. There is just something comfortable about being with someone who has known you for years--knows your personality well. I feel almost like its a constant job interview around here: I'm applying for the position of your friend. It probably all goes back to the innate fear of rejection.

The Honeyman is coming down this weekend, that may help this random funky mood I'm in.