Sarah is hil-ar-i-ous!!! There have been many many times I've wished I'd had a tape recorder or paper & pencil with me while having conversations with her. She is hilarious, intelligent, short, skinny, and cute...wait...she totally sucks! Dang it...I need ugly boring friends so I can always show them up!!! Why am I friends with her?
"Why I Should Take My Skills Elsewhere"
A Discourse on the Best Buy, Inc.
By: Sarah Crane
Customer Specialist
The scene, a Best Buy store in Orem, the day [insert today's date here]. Back in the DI department (digital imaging that is) a lone worker faces the tragedy and triumph of selling electronics to mindless consumers who are trying, fruitlessly, to feel their lives are fulfilled by buying things they don't actually need. That soldier, marching against the tides of consumerism, stands as a lone example of the integrity of honesty in the workplace. Valiantly, she defiles the traditional ideals of revenue and actual success. Instead, she adopts her life-changing motto, "How nice to do nothing...and the rest afterward." When customers approach her, she doesn't send them on their way as she often feels like doing, instead she politely informs them that they are, in fact, grown adults and there is absolutely no reason why she should have to educate them on such rudementary subjects as mpegs, jpegs, and pretty much the history of the universe!!! But alas, it is necessary that she do so in order to protect her coveted employment at this fine institution.
Suddenly, a large, unattractive man runs around the corner, all eyes focused on our servant to the greater good. You can see the fear and loathing in her eyes as he thrusts a brochure labeled "PSP" on the front into her tightly clasped fist. "You need to sell more PSP Sarah, your department sucks." (That's not a stray from the truth, mind you.) Boldly she responds, "You know what, I don't give a rat's."
Swing by Her Blog and leave her wonderful comments about how incredibly cool she is. K?
Infamous Sarah Quotes:
"How can I respect you when you are wearing hoop earrings, Sir?"
"An knife-throwing Albino, you don't see that everyday!"
"I gotta be honest with you though, trying to translate a pregnancy test from English to Spanish was difficult."
{This is harassment.}
"No it's not sir, you haven't even spoken yet, how can you be harassing me?"
"I shocked myself ...and it wasn't by my amazing wit, either!"
"I'm a bed connoisseur of sorts. If I don't get a good nights rest I'm offended ...by the world, mostly."
"You can come up with the best stuff while stalking your old boyfriend who doesn't like you anymore for 2 hours. Great stuff."
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